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October 2005, Trust — Tell the Truth

Musing

As the days shorten, I allow myself more time to indulge even more in one of my passions - reading. I believe it is very important for those of us who teach, consult, coach or lead in any arena, to keep up by reading the best material out there. When I coach executives, I always require that they read certain books. I am currently reading Margaret Wheatley's latest book “Finding Our Way: Leadership For an Uncertain Time". She wrote the well-known “Leadership and the New Science" and is an eloquent voice for creating more resilient and adaptive organizations and communities that are harmonious, creative and generous. A must-read for managers and leaders. So, support your local independent bookstore and library by reading some good books this fall. And before you hire a coach, ask them about the most recent three or four books they've read. That could lead to a great discussion!

Tool

This will be the third tip in the series on creating trust in the workplace. In prior months, I focused on the importance of keeping your word and being competent. This month the topic is honesty.

Does your team at work really believe you are honest? Honesty simply means full disclosure - with GOOD INTENT. Always check your intent before your share “your truth". Obviously, it is YOUR truth, since what each of us believes to be true reflects our views about reality. Are you willing to have “real" conversations with your co-workers, employees, and spouse? When was the last time you said what you really thought and felt? Do you give Frequent, Accurate, Specific, Timely feedback? Do you check out your assumptions before you assume you are right? Are you generous with passing on meaningful information? The free-flow of information on a team contributes greatly to the trust level. What is the conversation you've been unwilling to have, that if you WERE willing to have, might make the difference, might change everything? Obviously, telling the truth can also be used as a weapon to hurt and diminish the other. Those who pride themselves on being brutally honest tend to focus on the brutality. I suggest the concept of "caring candor" - making sure my delivery makes it easier for the other person to hear it. Telling the truth takes courage, lots of it. It starts with telling the truth to you. Take a risk today. . .

Food for Thought

" When you shoot an arrow of truth, dip its point in honey."
— Arabian proverb

"Honesty has a way of releasing energy, the kind of energy that business desperately needs to embrace. Time after time, I've witnessed the paralysis that sets in when people are afraid to tell each other the truth."
— Margaret Heffernan in Fast Company

Laughter

Some great one-liners:
  1. I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don't know what to feed it.
  2. I went to San Francisco. I found someone's heart.
  3. All I ask is a chance to prove money can't make me happy.
  4. I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous. What if there were no hypothetical questions?
  5. One nice thing about egotists... they don't talk about other people.
  6. A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.
  7. What was the greatest thing before sliced bread?
  8. The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity.
  9. If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?


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