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Back to the Notes from the Coach Table of Contents January 2007, What is Feedback?MusingWelcome to another year! We are all blessed to be alive as we see another year begin and enter the mystery and adventure of the next 365 days. In spite of everything going on, I find myself optimistic about the possibilities for this New Year.Some of you are setting goals for this year. Goals can be an effective strategy for simply being clear what you want this year to be about and to inspire you to fall more deeply in love with your life! Make it manageable: pick about three goals that result in giggling and feeling excited. I always recommend choosing one word that captures what you want this year to be about. If you focus on that word (put it up on your wall) it helps you create that experience during the year. My word for 2007 is EASE. I’m done with struggle. I have perfected the experience over a lifetime of practice and I no longer believe that it needs to be difficult to be good or valuable. My first chance to practice is with this newsletter! So, what do you want your year to be about? ToolOne of my beliefs is that most people are not comfortable or proficient in the skill of giving and receiving feedback. In all the groups I facilitate, there is a constant theme among managers: putting off giving necessary feedback or the desire to create a culture where feedback is given and received with ease and grace, and where 360 degree feedback and performance reviews are eagerly anticipated and useful! I will devote the next few Issues to this topic.First, I would invite you to be curious about your beliefs, assumptions and "rules" around feedback that you learned growing up and which are possibly still operating and influencing your behavior. Although many people attach "feedback" to criticism in their minds, feedback is simply INFORMATION. The main benefit of receiving feedback from the people in your life is information about how your behavior impacts others. Also, it is useful in supporting more consciousness and awareness of what we do and how others perceive us. You have experienced this vividly if you've ever seen yourself on video! You will be hungry for feedback if growing, learning and being more excellent are priorities. I encourage the organizations I coach to create "feedback friendly" cultures where employees are comfortable asking for feedback, where everyone offers it readily and the feedback is useful and constructive. When this doesn't happen, poor performance or ineffective behavior goes on too long and people do not feel adequately acknowledged or appreciated. Feedback should not be withheld until those ghastly once or twice a year "performance reviews",(subject of a future newsletter!) but should be an ongoing, natural activity. This takes self-awareness (what is my intention in giving it?), courage (we never know how it will be received), skill of delivery, and a commitment to strengthening our relationships and our performance in the workplace. So, start with curiosity. What "rules" (do's and don'ts) regarding feedback did you learn that get in your way of offering feedback? What are your major fears around giving feedback (your gut reaction to "Why don't you tell her?") What is the role of feedback in your workplace? What are your favorite excuses or reasons for putting off giving necessary feedback to employees or colleagues? Are you "feedback friendly" or do you tend to get defensive, withdrawn or resentful when you receive feedback from your employees, co-workers or spouse? Next month: How to do it! Food for ThoughtFeedback is the breakfast of champions. — UnknownTell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life? — Mary Oliver LaughterZEN FOR THOSE WHO TAKE LIFE TOO SERIOUSLY
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